Wednesday, January 10, 2007
[I thought it might be helpful to shorten and clarify The State's latest editorial gem.]
Do you know what I hate about you, maggot? No, it's not your ugly face or your smelly feet; you can't help those things.
No, here's what I hate about you. It's how you live your life. Your stupid, little, pathetic life. Through your bad choices, you make your life even stupider and less worthwhile.You drink too much.You smoke too much.And you're fat, fat, FAT!Honestly, it is so disgusting to live in the same state as you people—you wretched, miserable people—that I am going to be forced to fight back. How? I am going to use the power of the state to make you change your life.
I know, I know. You like your precious wittle "liberty." You like having a cigarette to unwind after work or throwing back a beer or 12 on the weekends.
Well, you're gross. You make me sick. And I'm powerful. So you don't get to abuse your liberty anymore.
Now, if I crack the whip just so, you're going to look just like me and act just like me. And I won't have to look at your ugly butt anymore. Now shut up and obey, like a good little servant citizen.
[Today's State Editorial page has been translated from the original gibberish.]
Posted by Bill Smith at 3:12 PM |
1 comments
[I thought it might be helpful to shorten and clarify The State's latest editorial gem.]